So it turns out that Professor Penis isn't dead after all. I saw him driving by me the other day in his cute little blue truck and the fucker didn't even wave. I have to admit that I sort of had this morbid hope that he was dead for some reason, like it would give me an excuse to be all melancholy and wistful for an afternoon or something. I ( Read more... )

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There's a customer at work, this pervy old man I call "Professor Penis." He's a short, skinny guy with glasses, in his 80's, but he's pretty active and spry for his age. I call him "Professor Penis" because when he comes into the store to watch movies, he's got this running story-line/joke going with me that he is "getting an education," that ( Read more... )